Humor
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Re: Election Funnies
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Sarah Palin's Church Promotes Conference to Pray Gays into Being Straight
Re: Election Funnies
Our Lady of the Rotten Green Seedless Grape
In an effort to promote The Sanctity of Hymens, the Blessed Virgin Mary Mother of God who never once yelled “Yes!” while some disgusting pig man was sliding the whole thing into her poontang, She, in Her Mercy, has caused a green seedless grape to rot and begin smelling like an unpenetrated hymen to inspire virginity among undocumented agricultural harvesters who pick grapes to give praise to Jeebus. At least that is what they are saying.
Usually grapes are just food, people eat them. Of course grapes can also be used to make wine if you do not have any deity around to auto-convert fluoridated city water into wine for you. But in this startling case a woman that was not even afflicted with Roman Catholic religious delusions discovered this unmistakable message from a fictional virgin believed to be the virginal mother of a half god half man edible deity. Becky Ginn of Arlington Texas suffers from Baptist-flavor religious delusions, and is not a Catholic at all. But apparently Ms Ginn does believe that virgin women can have babies without the direct intervention of a fertility doctor.
The grapes were rotten, and Ms Ginn was about to throw them in the trash, when she recognized on one rotten grape the image of a woman she had never met. It’s funny that nobody who has never met regular people recognizes their image on a grape. It seems that a person needs to have a perfectly virginal and unpenetrated hymen before grape appearances become possible.
Much can be said about the amazing visual pattern recognition skills of Ms Ginn, most people would not be so easily able to recognize a person they had never met or even seen in an actual photograph.
Let this grape serve as an inspiration for all undocumented immigrant farm workers who pick grapes for below minimum wages and are constantly in fear of some Republican candidate exploiting their marginal situation for political gain, and let the lesson be - save the rotten grapes to sell on eBay.
Technorati Tags: holy grape, hymen, virgin mary, divine fruit, pareidolia, Texas, catholic, immigrant farm workers, undocumented aliens, fictional virgins
